<Subject: My Barfday Handgurbler story..
Date: 2/21/2002 10:43 AM Central Standard
Time
From: Pup3
Well folks, thanks for all of da neat Birfday
wishes, the FTD Wowm Bouquet fwom Bennie
and Willie, and the new pet Birfday worms
from Sid. I had me a gweat birfday...sorta...
I wanna tell ya about my big 'venture and
my Birfday dinner. Mom and Dad gots a favorite
little pwace to go for handgooblers. It's
a Woot Beer Stand. Dey ain't hardwy no chairs
inside, so you gots to stay in yow car and
eat out dere.
Fow dis reason, it is one of me and SPunky
MOnkeys faborite pwaces too.
But I digwess. On da night in question, at
approxamatewy 7:30 P.M., Mom and Dad loaded
all of us little ones..(If da Saint Bernards
get to go there is not room fow a driver,
or us, dey claim), into da big monstor truck...and
we went off to da woot beer pwace for a handgurbler.
We got dere and Mom stayed in da twuck with
us boys, while Dad, in all of his infinate
wisdom, went up to da window to pwace da
order fow owe dinnew.
I hate it when Dad leaves me, so as soon
as he got out, I stawted going sort of nutso,
and I took contwol ober da vehicle, and jumped
in da dwiver seat...and then promtly twied
to put the Monstor twuck in reverse by jumping
on the gear shift. Mom barely saved us from
neaw calamity deluxe when I decided the emergency
flashers needed to be on....(In case no one
told ya, we are on high alert for terrorists)
Before she could get da fwashers turned of,
in my esitement over my Birfday, I reached
over and hit the switch and switched radio
stations from golden oldies to "HARD
BOOGIE", AND I hit the volume button,
and turned da music up WAYYYYY high, to where
owe twuck resembled one ob does thumpa-thumpa
vehicles you see going down da road with
their radios blastin everyone within hearin
distance stwaight to da hearin aid factory.
Dad was headin back wif a look ob wowwy and
disgust on his face, to see of we done been
took ober by aliens. The flashers wuz a goin
and da radio wuz blastin, and da twuck was
a stawten to bounce up and down in time wif
da music... Mom had all four of us tramplin
on top of her, and it was about den, when
I stepped on da power door wocks and locked
Dad out..while not so smooth jazz was a blarin
on da radio, and it was also stawtin to spwinkle.
The only thing not a goin wuz the winshield
wipers...dat was until Spunky Monkey got
dose goin, on his attempt to get to Dad,
who was standin outside da driver door, holdin
his eaws...and lookin at the sky, which was
started to dwop dwops on him. We wuz beginning
to dwaw a croud.
Dad finally got in, and as soon as he got
all of us offa Mom, the guy inside motioned
for him to come back and get ouw dinnew.
Oh man...he looked like he was goin into
battle...he came back on Moms side and handed
her da stuff through her window.....one thing
at a time, while she screamed "STAY
IN DA BACK SEAT AND STEP AWAY FWOM DA POWER
DOOR WOCKS. "
Aftew Dad got back inside, things were goin
pwetty well. Mom feeded us each bites of
a plain handgurbler wif no pickles or onions...(Pickles
and onions don't like us she says)....and
den, wifout no wawning at all...I barfed
it all up..silently of course, right on top
ob der french fwies, which we are not awwowed
to hab. Dey didnt eben know I been sick,
till dey reached fow one ob da fwies......oops.
Right when Mom reached for a fwy....she said,
" EWWWEEE GOOD LORD WHAT HAPPENED HERE!"
Dad filled her in on da intricate workings
of a guy's stomach.
Luckiwy, Spunky Monkey decided to offer to
"clean up da mess all by hisself",
which rendered both Mom and Dad tottawy appetitewess.
Yup..it was a GWEAT Birfday! Thanks you guys!
Lub Chipper da Tall.>